Monday, August 31, 2009

Where Do I Start?

So much has happened. Where do I start?

We got Holden moved into his apartment on the 23rd. I did OK until it was time to tell him goodbye. I hugged him and told him I loved him and then I quickly walked to my car as I felt the tears start to spill out of my eyes. Once I got in the car I really started crying and then noticed that Riley was crying too. He and I took turns crying for the next 20-30 minutes. Riley slept in Holden’s bed every night last week and every morning he would tell me how many more days before Holden would be home again.

Holden enjoyed his first week of school. He came home Friday because he had to work. I didn’t see him much, but I did get to see him some. We were able to watch a movie together Friday night. I teared up a little when he told me goodbye last night, but I never cried. The plan this week is to go see him and take him out to eat and then watch Halloween 2 together. We both like horror movies and it gives me an excuse to see him. He doesn’t have to work this weekend, so I don’t know if he’ll be coming home or not.

For the most part, I’ve done OK with him being gone. Most of the time, I don’t think about it. But, then, sometimes, it will hit me that he’s not coming home at night and I miss him. That’s the worst: when he’s not home at night when we go to bed.





Riley had a very good first week of school. He loves his teacher and she has done an awesome job with him. Last school year, which will hence forth be known as “the year of the bad sugars”, Riley said he didn’t like school. He made good grades (all As) and he loved kindergarten the year before. I didn’t really make much of it. I knew I had some reservations about his teacher. I didn’t really know how Riley felt about her until he started 2nd grade. Now, every day he’s come home and said how much he loves school. It seems he didn’t feel very comfortable with his teacher last year. I don’t think she really gave his D the attention it deserved and sometimes gave it the wrong attention. Now, I realize that it was probably stressing him out, thus the high sugars. And, to be honest, it makes me mad. I know it was an added responsibility for the teacher, but it upsets me that Riley picked up vibes from her that made him uncomfortable. But, that’s water under the bridge.

His teacher this year is wonderful. As I said before, she was my second grade teacher as well as Holden’s. I knew she was a great teacher, but didn’t know how she’d handle his D. So far, she has done a great job. I know Riley feels more comfortable with her and she told me on Thursday when I picked him up that she was already feeling more comfortable with it. On Friday she sent a note home which read: “Riley has had a good first week of second grade. He is a hard worker and a sweet boy. I am amazed at his ability to cope and admire you for the hard work that you put in to keep him healthy.” It brought tears to my eyes when I read it.

So far, his sugars have been OK. He had one day where he was in the 300s at lunch, but it came down just fine with insulin. The rest of the week went pretty well. His sugars weren’t perfect (when are they ever?). But, I was pleased with how they did for his first week of school. I sat down Saturday and tweaked his basals some to see if that will help a little. So far, knock on wood, he hasn’t had a single low at school. (Now, I’ve probably just jinxed it.) The start of school couldn’t have gone any better than it did.




My mom is still not doing well. She’s not quite as bad as she was before her surgery, but she’s not well either. She is going back to the doctor tomorrow to figure out what to do next. She is sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. Even though I see her every day, I miss my mom. I want her back like she used to be.




And, last but not least, public school started around here on August 25th. North Carolina has been cutting a lot of things out of the budget for this year. I heard horror stories of other counties around me laying off teachers and other state employees. Well, that cutting started happening around here the day before school started. At 3:40 PM on the Monday before school started, I got a call to be at central office for a mandatory meeting at 4:00. I was terrified. I just knew that I was going to be fired.

Turns out, instead of firing anyone, they just shuffled us around. Instead of being at my regular elementary school where I was last year, I was told that as of 8 AM the next day I would be reporting to another elementary school. I had no way to prepare. I didn’t know any of the children at the other school, nor did I know where anything was in the office. But, I was happy to still have a job.

I think they shuffled us all around to try and make someone quit. So far, no one has. I still feel like my job is up in the air. Right now, I still have one and that’s all that matters. I really like the school where I am now. It is less stressful than where I was last year. But, I still kind of miss the kids in the other school. I knew them. And, my student with diabetes got a pump over the summer and I was looking forward to working with her this year.

OK, that’s enough rambling for now. I will really try to update more often, so I don’t have to jumble everything together.

7 comments:

Amy said...

So glad to hear that Holden got off to college and you survived!:) And that Riley had a great start to the year! I hope the rest of it goes well--sounds like he has a very supportive teacher.
Will continue to pray for your mom-- poor thing! Hang in there!

k2 said...

Your doing great girlfriend!!
I feel for you & Riley- I was mess when my sister Cathy went to college- she's 10 yrs older than me and was my world! You tell Riley - visited my sister at school and we are still best buds today!

Glad the boys both like school, sending bucket loads of prayers to you and your mom!

As far as work- hang in there- and continue to do your best- things will work themselves out!
(((HUGS)))
Kelly k

meanderings said...

Both boys are happy and you still have a job! How great is that?!
Riley's teacher sounds like a "keeper."

George said...

George is a Sophmore and already I am dreading this day. I was tearing up through out this entire post.

I am thinking about you my friend and sending hugs your way.

Penny Ratzlaff said...

Amy,
Thank you for your prayers.

Kelly,
There is 11 years difference between Holden and Riley, but they are very close.

Colleen,
She is a "keeper" indeed. I try to count my blessings every day. The whole way there taking Holden to college I just kept telling myself that at least I still had a son to go and visit. Some mothers are not that blessed.

George,
Thanks for the the hugs. Right back at ya. I'll be there for you too in a few years when yours goes off to college too.

Carey said...

Thank goodness you and Riley like his new teacher. I'm very sorry to hear that your mom isn't doing so well. Hang in there.

Meri said...

HI! I just found you and I wanted to say hello. :)

Here in California they are dropping teachers right and left. It is soo so sad. My sweet sister in law just got her teaching credential and it will be years before she'll be able to get her own classroom. They won't even look at your application these days unless you have experience teaching, because there are so many teachers with years of teaching under their belt that have been put back into the hiring pool.

I so happy that you have a job! Way to show them that you will find happiness where ever they send you!