As I was getting ready this morning, Riley was propped up on the couch.
“Mom, it’s almost Easter right?"
“And that’s Daddy’s birthday too, right?”
“And, then after Daddy’s birthday, it’s my birthday?”
“And, I’ll be five and then I’ll start school.”
“Yeah. Are you excited about going to school?”
I kept getting ready. I was checking his strips to see if I needed to pack any extra in his bag when he asked, “Mama, who is going to take care of my sugars and my pump when I’m in school?”
I stopped what I was doing and swallowed, hard. I was trying to get rid of the big lump that had suddenly formed in my throat.
“Well, sweetie, you can check you sugar yourself and your teacher is going to learn how to do your pump and count your carbs.”
“And, Holden will be there too, right? And, he can count my carbs and give my insulin.”
“And, A and S will be there too.” (other kids with D)
“Yes, and also W. She has diabetes too and wears a pump just like yours. And I’ve already talked to her mom and she says W will be able to help out too if you need her. So, you see, you’re going to be OK. You’ll have lots of people looking out for you.”
“OK”, he said. And, with that, he jumped off the couch, grabbed his Star Wars movie and headed out the door.
And, I thought, Why can’t I be like that, just say OK and go on with my life?
I have a lot of time to think when I’m driving from one patient’s house to the next. So, I’ve been thinking about this conversation a lot today.
And, I keep coming back to a little plaque that is on my desk at work. A patient gave it to me. It says: GOD IS GREATER THAN ANY PROBLEM I HAVE.
And, I think that the reason Riley went on and didn’t worry anymore is because he knew his mommy would handle it. Why worry? If mom says it’s going to be OK, then it will.
It’s a beautiful day here today. As I was driving down the road with my sunroof open and “Pour Some Sugar on Me” blasting on the radio (cut me some slack, I grew up in the 80s, OK?), I had tears in my eyes. And, this time, they were happy tears.
It took my four year old to remind me that no matter what, I’m never alone. No matter what, there’s always someone who has my back. And, He promised me He’d never give me anything that He and I couldn’t handle together.
So, for today, I’m not worried. My faith waivers from time to time. Sometimes I forget that I’m never alone and neither is Riley. But, for today, I know everything is going to be OK. Because, we’ll get through it together.